Where is God When My Child is Crying?

Seems like a very empathetic notion, doesn't it? Well, what I really mean is, "where is God when my child is throwing a complete all-out tantrum on a day when we have lots of we-can't-get-out-of-it activities (orientation for older child starting school) and I've prayed for her cooperation"? That's right. More about me than the child this time! Maybe that's where this whole enterprise went wrong. Keep reading and it will make more sense (I hope).

I have been worried about today for awhile. Ever since learning that the orientation at my son's new school is during the day and, better yet, during my younger child's naptime. Having no one to watch said younger child means she has to miss her nap and come with. Did I mention that my youngest is NOT pleasant when she doesn't get her sleep? Oh, and she is very obstinate in a undistractable, cannot please no matter what, and cannot sweet talk or even bribe way. So, for the past several days, I have prayed to God for peace today. For no tantrums and and that my youngest would be in a pleasant mood.

You would think this would be no problem for God. I mean, He cares about us and the particulars of our lives, right? Well, the exact opposite happened. Yet another time in my life (it happens a LOT lately with everyone) where I talk but it's as if nothing is actually coming out of my mouth if you judge by the reactions (or lack thereof) of those I'm talking to. Kate woke up early this morning. So, absolutely no extra sleep this morning to make up for missing naptime today. And she was very grumpy right from the start. And I'm using the term grumpy very lightly here - Kate's grumpy is extreme. She's not happy with anything, even things she normally likes. She screams "no" at the top of her lungs a lot and throws herself on the floor. You have to physically drag her to get her to go anywhere or do anything. So, I said another prayer, much more desparately this time, that Kate's mood would change so that I could get through my day without hurting someone.

Again, no answer. Nothing. No change. After morning Bible study, where Kate was fussy for the childcare workers, I gave the kids lunch and put Kate straight to bed. I reasoned that if I put her to bed early she would be able to get at least a little sleep before having to go to Will's school. She grunted, fussed and talked to herself in her room for an hour, falling asleep a mere 15 minutes before I had to wake her to leave. Needless to say, she wasn't happy to be woken up (she never is) and screamed the whole way to the school. She also screamed most of the way home. Let me repeat: Where is God when my child is crying (and I'm about ready to throw her out the window???

I am thankful, however, that she was good while there. That, I guess was the answer I received to my prayer. And, I guess, here comes the lesson. God doesn't always answer our prayers in the way we expect. I would have loved my answer to be Him making Kate well-rested and happy all day long. He saw through my fears for the day and took care of that. I feared losing my temper and being embarrassed in front of all of the other people. I feared having to drag a screaming child out of the classroom and having Will's orientation time interrupted by Kate. I feared that Kate would be a complete and total distraction in the classroom, ruining Will's experience when he needed me to be focused on him. Kate was calm and good during the classroom time, despite screaming both to and from the school. I was able to focus on Will, the classroom, the information from the teachers, and talk to the teacher herself.

Thank you, God, for being there when my child was screaming. And thank you for showing me the wisdom of your ways even in the midst of my obstinance and irritation. Speaking of obstinance, I guess I know where Kate gets that little trait!